Thursday, May 31, 2007

FW: Why did the chicken cross the road?

 
 

Name

Why did the chicken cross the road?

KINDERGARTEN BOY 

 To get to the other side.

PLATO 

 For the greater good.

ARISTOTLE

 It is the nature of chickens to cross roads.

KARL MARX

 It was a historical inevitability.

TIMOTHY LEARY

 Because that's the only trip the establishment would let it take.

SADDAM HUSSEIN 

 This was an unprovoked act of rebellion and we were quite justified in dropping 50 tons of nerve gas on it.

CAPTAIN JAMES T. KIRK

 To boldly go where no chicken has gone before.

HIPPOCRATES

 Because of an excess of phlegm in its pancreas.

MARTIN LUTHER KING, JR.

 I envision a world where all chickens will be free to cross roads without having their motives called into question.

MOSES

 And God came down from the Heavens, and He said unto the chicken, "Thou shalt cross the road." And the chicken crossed the road, and there was much rejoicing.

RICHARD M. NIXON

 The chicken did not cross the road. I repeat, the chicken did NOT cross the road.

MACHIAVELLI 

 The point is that the chicken crossed the road. Who cares why? The end of crossing the road justifies whatever motive there was.

BILL GATES

 The newly released Chicken 2003, will not only cross roads, but will lay eggs, file your important documents, and balance your checkbook.

DARWIN  

 Chickens, over great periods of time, have been naturally selected in such a way that they are now genetically disposed to cross roads.

EINSTEIN 

 Whether the chicken crossed the road or the road moved beneath the chicken depends upon your frame of reference and relativity.

GEORGE BUSH

 We are committed to establishing a democracy where chickens freely cross roads without oppression from terrorist organizations.

Azharuddin

I am totally innocent, you know, I'm unnecessarily being dragged into this, you know, because I'm from the minority..... I neither know the chicken nor the road, you know....

George Fernandes

I am deeply hurt that this question is being asked after my 40 clean years of public life. I don't own a house, or a car, leave alone a chicken !!!

Mulayam

I demand a 50% reservation of the road for the chicken class, so that they can cross the road freely without their motives being questioned

ARJUN SINGH

 Our policy will ensure the development of socially underprivileged chickens so that they can also cross roads.

Abdul Kalam

Yes, why did the chickens cross the road? .. please tell me why? .. they crossed to go to the other side of the road... now repeat after me ....

Advani

I see Pakistani hand in this ...

Vatal Nagaraj

No Tamil or outside chickens will be allowed to cross our roads, our roads are meant only for Kanadiga chickens!.

Bal Thackarey

Chickens crossing the roads is against our culture, my followers will stone all such chickens which cross the road.

Jayalalithaa

From reliable sources I've got the information that the chicken belongs to Karunanidhi. He is making his chicken cross the road to create law & order problems. The chicken has now been imprisoned under POTA.

Amitabh Bachhan

The chicken has crossed the road?.. are you sure.. very sure ... really sure...

Venkaiah Naidu

 "We are very sure of the fact that the chicken did not cross the road. It's a conspiracy by the congress. The poor chicken has been made a scapegoat in this whole issue"

H.S.Surjeet

We are adopting a wait and watch policy. We have convened a meeting of the third front today. We will decide the future course of action after the chicken comes back..

Maneka Gandhi

Chicken crossed the road alone...!! If a vehicle had passed over it, we would have lost one of our dearest creatures. Ban all vehicles from using the road. Protect our chickens...

Salman Khan

I ran over the chicken (Hic!). It was not intentional ...... It was accidental (Hic!)... ... you're now asking this question to me only because I'm a celebrity(Hic!

Raahol Singh

The chicken was just helpling a chick (babe) cross the road..Poor soul (the chicken)

 

 


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FW: GOOD ONE

 
 An old man was sitting on a bench at the mall. A young man walked up to the bench and sat down. He had spiked hair in all different colors: green, red, orange, blue, and yellow.

The old man just stared.

Every time the young man looked, the old man was staring.

The young man finally said sarcastically,
"What's the matter old timer, never done anything wild in your life?"

Without batting an eye, the old man replied,

"Got drunk once and had sex with a peacock.
I was just wondering if you were my son."

Disclaimer:
This e-mail may contain trade secrets or privileged, undisclosed or otherwise confidential information. If you have received this e-mail in error, you are hereby notified that any review, copying or distribution of it is strictly prohibited. Please inform us immediately and destroy the original transmittal. Thank you for your cooperation.

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