Friday, March 28, 2008

Fwd: Origin of the Human Race

Origin of the Human Race

A little girl asked her mother: How did the human race appear?The mother

answered: God made Adam and Eve and they had children and so was all

mankind made.

Two days later she asks her father the same question.The father answered:

Many years ago there were monkeys from which the human race was

developed.The confused girl returns to her mother and says: Mom', how is it

possible that you told me that the human race was created by God and Papa

says they were developed from monkeys.

The mother answers: Well dear, it is very simple. I told you about the

origin of my side of the family while your father told you about his side..

Monday, March 24, 2008

Don't copy if you can't paste !

A popular motivational speaker was entertaining his audience. Said he:
"The best years of my life were spent in the arms of a woman who wasn't
my wife!"

The audience was in silence and shock.
The speaker added: "And that woman was my mother!"
Laughter and applause.

A week later, a top manager trained by the motivational speaker tried
to crack this very effective joke at home. He was a bit foggy after a
drink.

He said loudly, "The greatest years of my life were spent in the arms
of a woman who was not my wife!"
The wife went wan with shock and rage.
Standing there for 20 seconds trying to recall the second half of the
joke, the manager finally blurted out "... and I can't remember who she
was!"

Moral of the story:
Don't copy if you can't paste!

Thursday, March 20, 2008

Tour the Googleplex
By Chuck Salter



Unlike most corporate campuses, Google actually feels like a college. The Googleplex in Mountain View, California, oozes ambition, fun, and an undeniable sense of community. The perks are as good as advertised -- and strategic. Google applies the same ingenuity to its internal operations as it does to Internet search, eliminating distraction so employees can keep thinking big.



Google offices are spread out, which could easily hinder collaboration. Walking is often too time-consuming, and driving isn't practical given the demand for parking. The solution? Dozens of free company bikes -- like the one that software engineer Stefan Kuhne is using here. The basket in front is for laptops, natch.



In addition to the bikes, which are lined up outside most buildings, employees can opt for these zippy company scooters. There's also the tandem bike that seats eight riders. Now that's teamwork.



To avoid IT-related delays and downtime, the company makes repairs unbelievably convenient. Employees with buggy browsers or overheated hard drives simply walk into one of the Tech Stops located throughout the Googleplex. The stations work like a doc-in-a-box staffed by IT experts.





It's easy to dismiss Google's perks as cushy, but often, they're as clever and useful as the "Did you mean?" function in its search engine. Take its laundry service. In addition to a free laundry room, Google has paid dry-cleaning pickup service. The convenience doesn't end there. The company also arranges for on-site oil changes.





Google has four full-time physicians, including an allergist. "We're trying to make your life outside the office more efficient," says HR manager Anne Driscoll. "We don't want you to spend three hours going to the doctor. Let's have doctors here on site, so it'll take 20 minutes."





Google operates a fleet of comfy, Wi-Fi-equipped shuttles that transport 1,200 employees a day from San Francisco to Mountain View. "It's insanely practical," says Matt Glotzbach, a product management director. "I get an extra two to three hours of productive time every day. People do e-mail, read books, listen to music. The shuttle eliminates the most stressful part of the day."





The downside of taking the shuttle to work is not having a car during the day. How do you meet with partners or customers? Employees hop in the company's plug-in hybrids that are part of its car-sharing fleet. An added bonus: Googlers give this cutting-edge technology much-needed visibility around town.





With more than 9,000 solar panels covering its buildings, Google has one of the largest corporate installations in the world. At peak output, on sunny days, the panels produce about 30% of the electricity needed for each corresponding building. "It's a significant chunk," says Bill Weihl, Google's green energy czar.





The Googleplex has 17 cafeterias that offer employees up to three free meals a day. The menus change daily. The philosophy doesn't. Chefs teach their captive audience about sweeteners, portions, the environmental consequences of plastic water bottles. That's why every table has a bottle of filtered water.



"I thought corporate food was about pre-made sauces and things dumped out of cans," says executive chef Josef Desimone. "But it's not like that [at Google]. We cook from scratch... We've got people from all over the world, and we think about bringing a piece of everybody's culture here. I'll hit them up for their grandma's recipes."



This gallery, displayed in one of the main buildings, captures the company's stature and playfulness. Here's a who's who of Googleplex visitors: Bill Clinton, George Soros, Jane Goodall, Robin Williams, Gwyneth Paltrow -- pictured alongside engineer Tan Chade-Meng. What started as a lark is now a routine part of visiting Google.



There's a number of massage rooms on campus where employees can get half-hour massages from trained therapists. Not to be confused with the rooms reserved for meditation.



No time to visit the massage therapist? No problem. That's what the cushy massage chairs around the offices are for. Here, application support specialist Matt Nicol takes advantage of one while taking his work with him.



Dogs are fairly common at startups, not at companies as big as Google. As long as the dogs are well behaved, they're welcome at the Googleplex. Here's software engineer Juliana Jaeger and her companion, Newton.



Forget that gym membership. Google has a spacious exercise room with personal trainers, an outdoor volleyball court, a basketball court, even a lap pool. "I can imagine a different company doing the same things and yet it could feel corporate and insincere," says engineering manager Niniane Wang. "The sentiment behind Google's actions is really important."



Part of the collegiate feel comes from all the games available around the office to employees-- ping pong, foosball, chess, pool, Wii, you name it.



In most buildings, there's a huge whiteboard that stretches nearly the length of a wall. At least it starts out white, but soon, it's filled with doodles, shout-outs, ideas, and, in one case, an enormous diagram for a Rube Goldberg-like machine.



Google chefs are committed to using local fresh foods. That includes growing some of their own vegetables and spices in 100 EarthBoxes, developed by the Growing Connection, a nonprofit that promotes sustainable food production. The planters, located in the main courtyard, demonstrate innovative techniques being used by communities in the developing world.



This may look like a booth at the International Toy Fair, but it's really the cube where Rudy Schusteritsch, a user-experience research manager, gets his work done. Google encourages employees to have fun personalizing their space, and they don't disappoint. Some even hold contests for the most tricked-out cube.



New Googlers are called Nooglers. They start out having lunch together in a designated area in the cafeteria to foster community and publicize new hires. An in-house tool called Percents calculates the percentage of people newer than a given employee. The rule of thumb: When you've been around longer than 1% of the staff, you cease to be a Noogler.



At night you can't help but notice how many people are still around. Not everyone's working, though. Some play Wii tennis, shoot hoops, jog around campus. It seems so, well, ordinary. But it's remarkable. How many companies do you know where employees don't want to leave at the end of the day?

Men will be Men...doesn't matter even if they are MEN IN BLUE!!!!!





Thursday, March 13, 2008

Secret behind happy married life... ...

Secret behind happy married life..........................

Once X asked Y, "What is the secret behind your happy married
life?"

Y said, "You should share responsibilities with due love and respect
to each other. Then absolutely there will be no problems."

X asked, "Can you explain?"

Y said, "In my house, I take decisions on bigger issues where as my
wife decides on smaller issues.  We do not interfere in each other's
decisions."

Still not convinced, X asked Y "Give me some examples"

Y said," Smaller issues like which car we should buy, how much amount
to save, when to visit home town, which Sofa, air conditioner,
refrigerator to buy, monthly expenses, whether to keep a maid or not etc
are decided by my wife.  I just agree to it"

X asked, "Then what is your role?"

Y said," My decisions are only for very big issues.  Like whether
America should attack Iran, whether Britain should lift sanction over
Zimbabwe, whether to widen African economy, whether Sachin Tendulkar
should retire etc etc.   Do you know one thing, my wife NEVER objects to
any of these".

 

J J J 

New Rajnikanth facts...

Rajanikanth makes onions cry

Rajanikanth can delete the Recycle Bin.

Ghosts are actually caused by Rajanikanth killing people faster than Death can process them.

Rajanikanth can build a snowman..... out of rain.

Rajanikanth can strangle you with a cordless phone.

Rajanikanth can drown a fish.
When Rajanikanth enters a room, he doesn't turn the lights on,......... .... he turns the dark off.

Brett Favre can throw a football over 50 yards.

Rajanikanth can throw Brett Favre even further.

The last digit of pi is Rajanikanth. He is the end of all things.

Bullets dodge Rajanikanth.

A Handicap parking sign does not signify that this spot is for handicapped people. It is actually in fact a warning, that the spot belongs to Rajanikanth and that you will be handicapped if you park there.

Rajanikanth' calendar goes straight from March 31st to April 2nd, no one fools Rajanikanth.

If you spell Rajanikanth wrong on Google it doesn't say, "Did you mean Rajanikanth?" It simply replies, "Run while you still have the chance."

Rajanikanth can do a wheelie on a unicycle.
Once a cobra bit Rajanikanth' leg. After five days of excruciating pain, the cobra died.

When Rajanikanth gives you the finger, he's telling you how many seconds you have left to live.

Rajanikanth can kill two stones with one bird.

Rajanikanth was once on Celebrity Wheel of Fortune and was the first to spin. The next 29 minutes of the show consisted of everyone standing around awkwardly, waiting for the wheel to stop.

Leading hand sanitizers claim they can kill 99.9 percent of germs. Rajanikanth can kill 100 percent of whatever he wants.

There is no such thing as global warming. Rajanikanth was cold, so he turned the sun up.

Rajanikanth can set ants on fire with a magnifying glass. At night.

It takes Rajanikanth 20 minutes to watch 60 Minutes.

Rajanikanth once shot down a German fighter plane with his finger, by yelling, "Bang!"

In an average living room there are 1,242 objects Rajanikanth could use to kill you, including the room itself.

Rajanikanth destroyed the periodic table, because Rajanikanth only recognizes the element of surprise.

Rajanikanth got his drivers license at the age of 16 Seconds.

The square root of Rajanikanth is pain. Do not try to square Rajanikanth, the result is death.

When you say "no one's perfect", Rajanikanth takes this as a personal insult.

~Nishant

Wednesday, March 12, 2008

Message From Mr Peter Walter...........

As you read this, I don't want you to feel sorry for

me, because, I believe everyone will die someday.
My name is Peter Walter, a merchant in Dubai, in the U.A.E.I have been diagnosed with Esophageal Cancer which was discovered very late, due to my laxity in carrying for my health. It has defiled all forms of medicine, and right now I have only about a few months to live, according to medical experts. I have not particularly lived my life so well, as I never really cared for anyone not even myself but my business. Though I am very rich, I was never generous, I was always hostile to people and only focus on my business as that was the only thing I cared for. But now I regret all this as I now know that there is more to life than just wanting to have or make all the money in the world. I believe when God gives me a second chance to come to this world I would live my life a different way from how I have lived it. Now that God ! has called me, I have willed and given most of my properties and assets to my immediate and extended family
members and as well as a few close friends. I! want God to be merciful to me and accept my soul and so, I have decided to give arms to charity organizations and give succour and confort to the less priviledged in our societies, as I want this to be one of the last good deeds I do on earth. So
far, I have distributed money to some charity organizations in the U.A.E, Algeria and Malaysia. Now that my health has deteriorated so badly, I cannot do this my self anymore. I once asked members of my family to close one of my accounts and distribute the money which I have there to charity organization and to the less priviledged in Bulgaria and Pakistan, they refused and kept the money to themselves. Hence, I do not trust them anymore, as they seem not to be contended with what I have left for them. The last of my money which no one knows of is the huge cash deposit of fourteen million dollars($14m) that I have with a Security Company in Europe for safe keeping. I will want you to help me collect this deposit and
disburse it to some charity organizations and to the less priviledged.

N/B:Kindly note that 40% of this funds must go to victims of Tsunami, Hurricane Katrina , Hurricane Wilma and South Asia Earthquake ,35% to other Charity Organizations around the World and 25% for your effort and time. I cannot talk with you on the phone due to my health situation, as I am using my Lap Top Computer to communicate with you. You should respond to this e-mail if you are interested in carrying out this assignment on my behalf.

Please send me a mai l to indicate if you will assist me in this disbursement.
I await to hear from you, may God be with you and your entire family.

May God Bless You,

Peter Walter.

Note from ForwardAddicts Team:

If the readers of this blog receive the $14M that Mr. Peter Walter promises, you have to pay $10 as royalty to the owners of this blog, because you found this golden opportunity on our blog. Also, all profits gained from forwarding mails coming from Tirupati, Sai Baba, and similar sources will attaract royalty of $10 for each favour received from the corresponding god.

We hope to collect enough money in this manner in order to support our blog :)

Cheers!

Forward Addicts Team

Tuesday, March 4, 2008

Anusua, has added you as a friend on SiliconIndia

Hi,

 I would like to invite you to join my network on SiliconIndia. It allows us to build an online network, access each others contacts, endorse them as well as request for introductions through contacts.

 Let us connect online and be in touch. http://www.siliconindia.com/register.php?id=1yqAZtP4

 Thanks

Anusua

Tuesday, February 19, 2008

A wonderful Note on believing in one's own capability

A 10-year-old boy decided to learn Judo despite the fact that he had lost his left arm in a terrible car accident. The boy began lessons with an old Japanese judo master. The boy was doing well, so he couldn't understand why, after three months of training, the master had taught him only one move.

"Sensei," the boy finally said, "Shouldn't I be learning more moves?"

"This is the only move you know, but this is the only move you'll ever need to know," the sensei replied.

Not quite understanding, but believing in his teacher, the boy kept training.

Several months later, the sensei took the boy to his first tournament. Surprising himself, the boy easily won his first two matches. The third match proved to be more difficult, but after some time, his opponent became impatient and charged; the boy deftly used his one move to win the match. Still amazed by his success, the boy was now in the finals.

This time, his opponent was bigger, stronger, and more experienced. For a while, the boy appeared to be completely outclassed.

Concerned that the boy might get hurt, the referee called a time-out. He was about to stop the match when the sensei intervened.

"No," the sensei insisted, "Let him continue." Soon after the match resumed, his opponent made a critical mistake: he dropped his guard. Instantly, the boy used his move to pin him. The boy had won the match and the tournament.

On the way home, the boy and sensei reviewed every move in each and every match. Then the boy summoned the courage to ask what was really on his mind. "Sensei, how did I win the tournament with only one move?"

"You won for two reasons," the sensei answered. "First, you've almost mastered one of the most difficult throws in all of judo.

"And second, the only known defense for that move is for your opponent to grab your left arm."

The boy's biggest weakness had become his biggest strength.

Sometimes we feel that we have certain weaknesses and we blame others, the circumstances and our self for it, but we never think that our weakness can become our strength one day. Each of us is special, so never think you have any weakness, never think of pride or pain, just live your life to its fullest and extract the best out of it.

"You have powers you never dreamed of. You can do things you never thought you could do. There are no limitations in what you can do except the limitations of your own mind."

Now on let us sing in unison,"......"There are no limitations in what you can do except the limitations of your own mind."

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